I have been thinking of writing a book designed for newbies getting into the hobby because it seems like there is a need for one.   I am going to keep this blog post short otherwise it will turn into a book because you know how much I love to write lol.


I have had lots of guys tell me they have learned new things by reading my blog posts.  This website is designed to not only entertain but also to inform. I get a lot of enjoyment out of teaching and mentoring others and it is always a joy to get an email from someone who was helped by something I said. Like this recent email I received, really made my day.  Sometimes when you write something, you have no idea if someone needs the information or even appreciates it, so it is nice to get emails like this.



I just finished reading most of your website and found it to be extremely informative and very helpful (your blog post: What you should never talk to me about in your correspondence).  I am 60 yrs old and I got burned recently because I had no clue about the do’s and don’ts when it come to protocol.  To make a long story short, I’ll just say she never wants to see me after my faux pas.  So thank you for being a kind-hearted companion who would rather educate than dismiss.



It is true most escorts will not educate you and instead will choose to throw your email in the trash and not answer you.  Or stop chatting with you because you made a faux pas.  I would rather not do that.  One of my passions is writing and teaching.  I get great joy out of doing this and I love passing along information so others can be enlightened vs being in the dark.  The saying: ignorance is bliss is not true.  Ignorance can get you into trouble.  Tis better to be in the light vs the dark.  Whether you are brand new to finding an escort or an experienced hobbyist, I hope this information helps you to understand the business better and not make a faux pas.  


On with the enlightenment!


I am going to list some of the major things newbies (and even experienced hobbyists) are prone to doing that could get you in the dog house with providers.


If an escort does not answer your email, it may have included one or more of the following faux pas:


1) Your first email does not have complete verification information, date and time of visit.  Most ladies get loads of emails everyday and they don’t have time to hand hold or play the email game. For example:


Hey Stephania

Saw your ad and website.  Videos are super hot and so are you!  I would love to see you next week for a 2hr incall on XXXX.  Are you avail?



Hi Josh


Nice to meet you.  I would love to meet you and yes I have that day avail.  What time works for you?  I also need to verify you first before I can see you so have you seen a provider before?  If so what is her name and email address/website?




Hi Stephania


I would like 2-4pm and her name is cheryl (my comment: who the fuck is cheryl?  Lol apparently this guy thinks I know every escort in the entire world)


Hi Josh


I do not know cheryl and I need her last name and her website address and/or phone #.  Also what information did you give her? Meaning did you just use your email and/or your phone # and if so what is it? What name did you use?


Hi Stephania


Her last name is smith and her website is XXXXXX and phone is XXXX.  I gave her my email only


Hey Cheryl


My name is Stephania Ricci TER 277884 and I wanted to verify josh.  His email is XXXXX.  Have you seen him and would you see him again? Do you have an addt’l information on him such as does he show up, is he considerate, does he cancel last minute? Thank you for your help with this and if I can ever return the favor please let me know.




Hi Stephania


I don’t see a josh in my file.  What is his last name and phone#?


Hi Josh


Cheryl needs your last name and phone # to verify you – so what is it?




Hi Stephania


My last name is Jayden and my phone # is XXXXX


Hi Cheryl


His last name is Jayden and his phone # is XXXX




Hi Stephania


Yes I see him now in my files and I can highly recommend him




Can you see how frustrating and time consuming this is to a provider?  This is why most providers opt to just throw your email in the trash when it is incomplete. It takes too much time to play the email game. Please be sure to include ALL of your information in the original email to any provider if you expect an answer back from them.


2) Your email is asking what sexual services and/or what you are going to get for said donation.  Or you also ask questions about the donation.


For example:


Hey Stephania


I would love to have you deepthroat me.  What is your donation for 1 hr.  Also do you do greek?  


Hey Stephania


If I book you for 2 hrs what am I getting for the donation?


These types emails will be thrown in the trash unanswered by pretty much every escort out there.  You do not mix sex and money in ANY correspondence (texting, emails, phone calls).  It is very incriminating for either party. How do you know I am not a cop? Now you are just admitting to me in writing that you want to exchange sex for money. I could now arrest you.


3) Your email is rude, sexually explicit, incoherent or unprofessional (ie: lots of typos makes you appear uneducated and higher class companions like myself value an intelligent man vs somebody that just got off the banana boat lol)


For example (btw I have never received any of the below emails and so I am making this up)


Hey stephania


You are a very sexy bitch and I would love to fuck you in the ass.  How much?  (lol I would laugh if I got this)


Hey stephania


ru avail tonigt? me horny and want sum pussy (lol this guy would never get laid)


4) You have been verified but are now asking about donation rates and/or sexual services


Just because you have been verified or are ok’d on p411, datecheck or whitelisted on TER, does not give you carte blanch to ask about either sexual services and donations in emails.  It is never a good idea to talk about sex or sexual services and/or donation rates in any text, email or phone call.  It protects you and the lady.  I just had a guy today I work verified and we have been emailing back and forth a little and today wanted to know what the donation was for 1.5 and 2 hrs dates.  I emailed him and told him to go to my website and see for himself since I cannot give him that information.  


5) You are emailing me too late for an outcall


Like tonight, I got an email at 8:30 from a guy in SF wanting me to come to him.  For myself, outcalls need to be planned in advance.  Incalls are a different story and there is more leeway on those. But with outcalls,  please email me in the morning or afternoon so I can prepare to come to you that evening.  I also have a private driver I use for outcalls and he needs advance notice as well.  


Tonight would not have worked out for SF guy anyway because I had just received some new toys  and I was busy playing with myself lol.  I had ordered these 3 dildos for my upcoming video and I had to try them out and they were amazing.  In case you are wondering why I had 3 dildos.  It is like goldilocks and the 3 bears (or if it was a porn it would be goldicocks and the 3 ladies lol) Anyway, each dildo was not working out for me to deepthroat in the upcoming video because one was too curved and the other was too short.  I finally found a 7″ life like feeling cock that went down my throat easily in the upcoming video.  See this blog post for more info on it https://stephaniaricci.com/updates/information-about-my-new-deepthroating-video/


If you are emailing me late at night like that, the odds I will be able to verify you in time are extremely low.  I really prefer pre-booking for all appts, but esp for outcalls please email me no later than that afternoon if you want to see me in the evening.  Also I prefer to start an outcall at 8 or 9 at the latest.  I have a 2 hr min on outcalls and I don’t want to get home too late so I prefer we start at 8 or 9.


6) You are sending an inappropriate picture.


Ok so here is a new one I just received today.  A man sends me a picture of him naked, holding his dick with a bath towel wrapped around it.  All the email said was “Can I see you today?” LOL no you may not.  I mean honestly, is this a way to approach any lady?  We do NOT want to see your dick or your naked body in a picture to ascertain whether or not we want to see you. We do not want to see you when you do this.  It is inappropriate to send a nude, semi-nude or dick pic to ANY lady ever.  It is too sexual in nature.  Also, some of you are married and do you really want to have to explain to your wife why you are sending this type of pic?  Lol didn’t congressman Weiner send out a pic of his dick and he got into trouble for it? I think it is funny that his name is weiner and he sent out a pic of his weiner. Anyway, please keep the pics to yourself.




I understand most of you gentlemen after seeing a provider do not think twice about using her name, phone # and/or email address without first contacting her to see if this is ok with her. However there can be some bad consequences as a result of doing this.  


Case in point.  About a month ago, a friend of a friend  named Cynthia, had someone contact her named Joe that wanted to see her.  He gave her the name and email address of someone he had recently seen.  She contacted the provider.  When the provider responded, she warned her that this guy was a cop and to be aware.  Now obviously, if any escort gets wind someone is a cop, stalker, violent, etc, she will not see that person – period the end!


She obviously did not want to see him at all and contacted him and told him something unexpected came up and she could not schedule him for an appt.  I guess he thought something was up and contacted his reference.  The provider must have explained to him she had told her he was a cop. Of course realizing she made a mistake and mixed up guys (apparently she had stalker after her and she believed the stalker was a cop. I don’t know, long story and it is still fishy to be honest), the provider contacted Cynthia to explain the situation and said he was ok.  She was still concerned because something still did not seem right about the story.  Like how do you forget who your stalker is and mix it up with someone else lol?  It sounded like a soap opera and she does not like drama.


In the meantime he sent her tons of emails that same day to try to clear up the situation and only made it worse because he kind of freaked her out with all of the emails lol.  In the end she did not believe he was a cop, but since she still did not feel good about the whole situation and with him sending tons of emails, she opted not to see him.


Now this is an extreme case obviously, but one worth paying attention to.  It is not a good idea to use a providers name and email out of the blue without contacting them first.  Not only to get their permission, but also warning them who you are and that so and so will be contacting you.  I personally think it is rude and inconsiderate to just use a persons name and email address without getting their permission.  Had he done this, the provider would not have made that mistake and he could have seen her.


I also want to point out 2 other faux pas in regards to this


Never use a providers name if you have not seen her recently.  Most escorts have a rule wherein if you have not seen them within 3-6 months time, they will not approve you for another provider.  A lot can happen with a gentleman over time.  If I approve you for someone and it has been a year since I have seen you, but in the meantime you have become inconsiderate, a no show, write fake reviews,  etc.  I don’t want the provider getting upset with me for recommending you.


Word gets out pretty quickly amongst the escort community if you are inconsiderate, no show,  cancel at the last minute and do not pay the cancellation fee, obnoxious, smell horrible, stalker, violent, etc.  In otherwards if you are a gentleman and you are kind and considerate, we ladies will not only want to see you again and again.  We will also recommend you to others.


For some inside information:  Be aware we will also warn other escorts if you either write fake reviews and/or give low ratings on review sites, esp if you had a great date with us and therefore the low rating is not justified.  I just had a lady warn me about a potential client.  She told me that even if he has a great date with you, he will still give you a low rating in the final review.  Which I think is insane because if you had a great date and are taking the time to write a review, then why not give an 8, 9 or 10 rating? She obviously does not deserve a low rating and it can hurt her business.  Lol that is all I had to hear to decline this guy.   Gentlemen: for some of us, the reviews can help business and when you rate an escort low , write a fake review or write a so so review then you are not helping out the lady and we like gentlemen and a gentleman helps a lady out.


Also, do not take advantage of her kindness.  Meaning, if she says you may use her as a reference, then do NOT use her more than one time and only for that specific lady you warned her would be contacting her.  It is rude to use her once and then use her again without once again contacting her.  Btw, she will say no.  Most providers have a rule of one visit – one reference.  Please keep in mind that ladies are doing this as a favor to you.  She is losing money when you go see another provider and she does not have to do this as she does not owe you anything.  She is doing it out of kindness and consideration – so please show respect of her time as well.  


Be sure to also see this additional post that goes into more detail about what not to say in your correspondence to me https://stephaniaricci.com/updates/1537/

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